The Stale Introvert

I know what you’re thinking. “Ugh, not one of those ‘boohoo I’m an introvert, nobody understands me sobs sobs’ kinda post.”

Believe me, I’m sick and tired of it too, eventhough I probably am one. God knows how many other people are sick and tired of me mentioning it as well. Yes, I’m talking about you. #youknowwhoyouare #idontblameyou

“So why on earth are you writing a blogpost about it?” Oh, we’ll get there, if you haven’t stopped reading by now.

You see, I was one of those who will read as many articles about ’27 problems only introverts will understand’ or ‘Signs you’re an INFJ’, and go on to shove the article in the face of a few close people in my life to ‘help them understand me better’. A while later I did one of those tests again and it says I’m an ISTP. Like any sane person, I continued to re-do the quiz in an INFJ mentality as many times as possible to get the outcome I wanted and hang on to the feeble hope that I hadn’t lose my ‘identity’.

But to be honest, I don’t always like being an introvert. I admired people who are able to strike up conversations with strangers effortlessly. I wished, on many occassions, that I would be able to feed on people’s energy and not get tired or obsess over a mere failed conversation. Then again, people will tell you that’s not what being an extrovert is either. There’s also the hipster ‘ambivert’ – equal in proportion of intraversion and extraversion – basically neither here nor there, which, to be fair, is all of us.

Some of my friends will even tell you that I’m clearly an extrovert. I like to laugh it off and let them think that way, because it’s a compliment to me. But my family and close friends will say otherwise. These days I’m even doubting my love language. It used to be both ‘quality time’ and ‘physical touch’, but now (as much as I hate to admit), ‘words of affirmation’ is starting to affect me a lot. But that’s for another blogpost.

My point is, the important thing isn’t who you are, but who God is, and how having that knowledge of Him reflects in your life, regardless of who you are at any given point in time. Because people change all the time. God doesn’t.

So don’t be so hung up on whatever the world tells you you are. Don’t even be hung up on who you think you are. Strive for self-forgetfulness. Strive to be what He wants you to be. Be loving, be joyful, be peaceful, be patient, be kind, be all that is good, be faithful, be gentle, and be self-controlled (Galatians 5:22).

Author: vanessachengxq

Redeemed by grace.

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